Dealing With Losing

I would say that I often lose more than I win. I'm not a loser, but I'm also not at the top of anything. It's actually kind of a nice place to be. I usually find that if I am the best at something, (usually only video games) and someone comes and seriously challenges me I can get really frustrated. If I'm only mediocre at something I can lose and usually still feel good about it. For that reason I am very glad that I don't excel at too many competitive things. Two examples from today. I was playing video games with my brother and was losing most of the time. I was getting kind of angry, though nothing serious. It was just while playing the game that I would get incredibly frustrated. It was surprising how quickly I would not care again once the game was over but how soon that same frustration would be rekindled immediately into the next game. Tonight playing dodgeball was not as bad because I know I am bad at the game. I would put on my game face while playing but as soon as I got hit I couldn't help but smile and laugh. Even when I got smoked in the neck 2 seconds into one game. I didn't have high expectations for myself and so I never got too upset about losing. I guess it's bad to have low expectations but on the other hand it makes life so much more pleasant. I think the trick is definitely finding a balance. I'm not sure exactly what I'm trying to say. I would say that overall I am a bad loser but my reaction is always mild and I end up not caring fairly soon after.

I've decided I should probably start a list of things for myself. If I'm going to get stuff done it is a good way to keep track of it. Maybe I'll start the list tomorrow.

I noticed today that another one of my videos was taken from archive.org and uploaded to youtube. I guess it's totally fair because I licenced them to be free to use with crediting me, which was done. It's just kind of annoying that someone else takes a video I made and posts it up and gets credit for the movie, even with my name attached to it. The movie had more hits than most of my youtube stuff combined. I should try to capitalize on that popularity but I'm not sure how to yet. I don't want to be an ass and complain about people taking my stuff because that's not the issue but there has to be a way that I can get more attention for myself. Having an audience is never a bad thing.